What to Wear to an Interview: Honest Trailers

1. Your big girl (or big boy) panties.

If you’re going for an interview, leave the childish attitude at the door. This includes all of the following (and more): obsessively checking your phone, “like” and “um”, the Hunchback of Notre Dame posture (the hunchback does not get the girl… or the job), fidgeting of any kind – pens, fingernails, foot tapping… Just sit still, for heaven sakes.

What’s more – if you’re going into an interview with a top finance executive in a fancy-shmancy office, get rid of the black or neon pink nail polish, the purple hair extensions, the nose/lip/eyebrow rings – basically anything your grandpa would call “goofy looking”.

2. A Pleasant Demeanor

I’m not asking you to smile like a weirdo the whole time.

I’m saying don’t be negative, complain about your previous job, paperwork, or previous co-workers, and if you remember one thing from this harshly true blog, remember this: “I Hated Group Work in School” is never an acceptable phrase to say, even if it’s the humblebrag with the additional “Because I Always Got Stuck Doing All the Work”.

3. Your Humblebragging Skills

I know, I know. I just made fun of humblebragging, but actually, it’s a good skill to have, if you do it right.

Worse than the arrogant bro-tank is the gem, the diamond, the perfect candidate who is too polite or shy to let me know, “Hey, I’m the perfect candidate for this job, and here’s why” – remember, your interviewer isn’t interviewing a bunch of strangers, posting and re-posting job ads, pleading daily with HR, and sifting through hundreds of resumes (some bearing the phrase “domestic engineer”) just for their own entertainment. They need someone – they need help. They need you.

4. A Normal Looking Outfit

By normal looking, I mean normal to them. Look at their website (during the research you’ve surely been doing since you found out about the interview, *hint, hint*) and try to wear what they’re wearing. Now is not the time to “outwardly express how you feel on the inside”. It’s a first date, where you hide all the weird stuff, like that Mickey Mouse tattoo you got that one night when none of your true friends were around to stop you.